Savage About Sobriety May 26, 2023

Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out. - Proverbs 20:5 (KJV).

I have been so blessed in my sober life to have several Godly men and women to talk to whenever I need advice on difficult situations I'm going through. These people are there whenever I pick up the phone and call and would drop everything if I needed their help when it comes to me staying sober. They are people I trust with personal details of my life: past and present. I reach out to these people daily and stay in contact with them. They will be the first ones to notice a change in my behavior or pick up on something bothering me that I may be holding inside and not necessarily wanting to talk about at first.

These people make up my support team in my recovery. Since staying sober is a life-long mission, I will always have a need for having a support team long after the drug classes, probation/parole officers, or courts stop telling me I have to have them. Who you choose to have in your inner circle is up to you. For me personally, I chose people who are Christians and share the same Christian values that I do. Some of them have experience with addiction, while some of them don't even know what alcohol tastes like. They do have a couple things in common: they give me advice and help keep me clean and sober.

The idea of seeking counsel or advice is a Biblical principle that is found numerous times throughout the Bible. Proverbs 11:14 says, "Where there is no counsel, the people fall;

But in the multitude of counselors there is safety. (NIV). When I read this verse I think of the recovery term "Failing to plan = Planning to fail." If you want to be successful in your plans to stay sober, you have to surround yourself with people to provide you with good counsel. This should be part of everyone's plan when it comes to staying sober. Too many times in the past, I surrounded myself with people who were still getting high. It's no surprise I relapsed and went back to doing the same thing everyone around me was doing.

Throughout most recovery programs, whether it is a 12-Step Program, Christian based recovery program, or non-Christian recovery program, there is an agreed upon need for a sponsor, accountability partner, or life coach. Whatever you choose to call this person is up to you, but they all pretty much have the same function: to be available to talk to when the urge to use becomes too much, offer advice on difficult "life" decisions, and to help shepherd you into your new life of recovery. In fact, a sponsor wears many hats.

Sponsors not only talk you through the times when you want to use, but they hold us accountable when they see areas in our life that could lead to us to using. Areas that we may not realize are weak spots, but end up being the straw that broke the camel's back in our recovery. They help us work out past hurts we may be hanging onto that will eat at us and destroy us from the inside out. They are there to help us celebrate happy times in our lives. They are also there when all we can do is throw our hands up and cry.

The best place to find a sponsor is through your church or whichever support group you attend. If you don't attend either, then you are planning to fail. Celebrate Recovery, Christway Recovery, Crossroads, and Reformer's Unanimous (RU) are just a few great programs you can find a sponsor at. Remember, recovery takes work and like most things, you get what you put into it.

I also offer my help to anyone who needs it. You can reach me through the contact form on this website. I get the emails on my phone and will usually respond within minutes after being contacted. For men, email me at kevin@savage2saint.com and for women, email Shevon at shevon@savage2saint.com .